Monday, August 21, 2006

Cancer, it just doesn't care who you are,

It's been so long since I wrote a blogg entry, March earlier this year..
So much has happened. So much to be thankful for and horribly some things to be soul destroying.
I work with kids from 12-18 helping them each and every day, and i wouldn't change it for a single second. But life just doesn't seem fair. One of my students has a brain tumor, cancer of course what other evil is so carefree with who it strikes. He's a great kid and I thought I was compassionate enough to understand it all, cancer that is, but I find that you can't and don't understand it until you have a direct family member go through it. Not a cousin or some friend but, your mum, dad, brother, sister, and heaven forbid your child. It tears your very soul. The destruction and trial of loss it leaves in it's every move is something I never would wish on my worst enemy. My dad (actually my step dad) in July was diagnosed with a type 4 glc something, in short a spider webbed cancer reaching all parts of his brain. In three short but long months he has become completely incapable of speech and movement. A man whom I respect and admire wasting away before my very eyes. I don't write this for any sympathy but to help me deal with this, this monster that destroy's. I suppose I should be thankful that it's not my brothers our any of the young children of the family, Ed has lived a great life. It's just now that it's so shitty. I hope and pray that one day soon they will stop this cold, heartless, taker of life and joy.
Well my eyes are sore from the tears that always find their way into moments of quiet and caring questions from friends, my heart is heavy with the things I'll never get to share with Ed, my marriage, my children, my success and even my failures. My only advice is to live each day with joy and love, don't let your friends ever think you don't appreciate them and put yourself out there to help anyone who needs you.
stay safe Tam

1 comment:

MissE said...

Hey T,
Love you.

Cancer really is a heartless and indiscriminate s.o.b.

I know you know it but my continuing sympathy for Ed - the world's lost a great guy.

Anytime you need me - you've got my number.

love always
M